As you may already know every 10th post I write about lessons learned from one of my teachers.
This is my 40th post and I want to share with you the lessons learned from my mom!
Before I ever found a life coach and learned all the things she teaches, and read all the books on self help I had the best teacher I could ever have. She laid the foundation for me to be able to absorb all of the teachings that I know now.
Here are a few ‘big’ beliefs she taught me:
1. You will always find the good in the people if you look. She taught me to use this approach when I’m going into a new situation when I don’t know people well and I’m nervous. This has served me SO well in all of my life. It allows me to focus on the people I meet instead of myself.
2. Never stop looking for the answers. You will figure it out, just ask the universe for what you really want and imagine it as if it was already true.
3. “Don’t beat yourself up.” – she would say that to me so many time when I would call to complain or vent. This one is so good because so many times I would beat myself up for something and wouldn’t be able to move on and grow. It is drilled into my head now after hearing it from her a million times.
4. Happy marriage doesn’t have to take longer than 20 mins a day. LOVE, love, love this one. It sets me so free knowing that i don’t have to strive for the most time spent, or the best time spent together, or any ‘romantic’ time spent together. Exploring ways how this can be true allows me to really let my marriage be what it is without wishing it was different. Some days we spend the whole day together and some days we are like ships crossing in the night and I love how i don’t have to make it mean that we are not ‘doing’ it right. So much freedom!
5. Lying down with your kids for a chat before bed can mean the world to them. My mom did that for my brother and I growing up and I still strongly remember how much we loved every minute of it. Even in our teens!!!!! Which is so important, i believe. Now I am able to do that for my kids. Having 4 of them means that they need that one on one time that much more! Thanks to my mom I can be there for them if they need to get something off their chest.
6. When stuck, look within yourself to see what You have done to contribute to the situation, not the other person. Own your stuff. Apologize. When i was a teenager my mom and I fought a lot. It was all thanks to my moms work on herself that we were able to get through that time. It wasn’t smooth at all but she took responsibility for her part of the deal and was an example for me of how to work on yourself and how to say sorry if needed.
7. The more you do – the more you have to time to do it.
She planted that seed for me early on and now I am able to create my own approach to time and make it exactly what I want. She taught me how to not be the victim of your time and obligations.
8. Be flexible like water, she would tell me. Water takes whatever shape it needs to when it flows, “so do that”, she would say. This also set me up for an open mindset of approaching life with the ‘I can handle and adjust to anything’.
I bet my mom would read this and have no idea she did all that for me, but i am so grateful to her for teaching me what she knows. There is so much more of course and there are beliefs that I learned that probably don’t serve me as well, but that’s not what matters now.
My mom doing HER work, showing up for herself, searching for her own answers, trickled down to planting so many good seeds in my head.
So do your work ladies!( and gents).
You never know what beautiful ripple effect it will have on the people in your life.