Tag decisions

My mom says

“I LEARNED TO MAKE A DECISION AND DECIDE THAT IT’S THE RIGHT DECISION” – NINA MATVEEVA

This is so powerful and straight out of my moms mouth!
Can’t help it but brag she learned it from working with me:) SO good!


Her testimonial coming

soon!! #decisions #decide #rightone #rightdecisions #mom

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A sock on the floor.

I make decisions quickly and strongly!

The truth is that is not fully true.
I would like it that to be 100 true but its not.  And it’s okay.
I have holidays unplanned, cars uncleaned, errands not run.  And I am tired.
So what? So nothing.
I move on to the next task and the next and before you know it I don’t have a problem with making decisions.  I have decided I don’t have that problem. I make decisions quickly and strongly.
Here’s what I just realized, I don’t have to make all the decisions at once and be great at decision making forever. I just have to make one decision about me being great at decision making and the rest takes care of itself.
I see yet another sock on the floor(boys and socks, eye roll) and instead of walking right by it I pick it up and throw in the laundry basket, why?
Because I made one decision : I’m great at making decisions. (chanting in my head) And a sock is just another small decision.
What one decision do you need to make to make all the other decisions irrelevant?
N

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What is Self-Confidence?

IMG_1097.5bd21da511c490.10131367.jpg

It is the ability and willingness to feel any feeling.

You are self-confident if you are not afraid to feel

• fear
• failure
• embarrassment
• humiliation
• isolation

What is the worst that can happen in life?

– death
– loss
– humiliation
– divorce
– decease
– rejection
– embarrassment

 

What makes those things bad for us?

The only way they are bad for us is through our feelings about them.

When they happen we feel pain, loss, humiliation, hurt, fear.

We are afraid we will be permanently damaged if these things happen.

That is not true.

If we are willing and able to process any feeling and stay with it as long as needed we will come out stronger and more confident on the other end.

That is all that’s required of us: to be willing to feel any feeling.

When we avoid ‘life’ because we are avoiding feeling horrible we think we are doing what’s best for us.

We think we are being safe, smart by choosing what’s predictable, comfortable and familiar.

What in fact happens is we are having doubts about ourselves.

We don’t know if we can handle what happens to us.

We are not sure if we can handle losing a close one, getting divorced, going for that promotion and being rejected.

When we are having self doubt we are creating the opposite of self-confidence.

What is your opinion of yourself and is it creating self-confidence or self-doubt?

 

P.S. If you want to know more about self-confidence schedule a one on one session with me and we can uncover your current beliefs about yourself and create new ones which will create the new confident you! Email me at natalia@coachingnatalia.com to schedule a time that works for you! Are you in ?

 

Natalia

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How do I make the right decision???

pablo (8)
Our large family of 6 recently attended a Christmas party at a friends house.  
It was everything a party should be: food, music, kids running around and grown ups chatting away.  
 
We really enjoyed it. So much so that I came home wondering why I don’t host as much these days.  
The wondering turned into feeling like something is wrong with me for not hosting parties and also not WANTING to host them. 
 
What is wrong with me? 
This was so fun, why wouldn’t I want to create that same experience? 
 
After a bit of self loathing i turned to my husband and asked him what he thought on the subject.
He is the best and reminded me that we have 4 little kids and hosting is a lot of work so it makes sense that we are not jumping at the first chance to host any gathering.
 
And of course he was right, i just forgot that in the middle of comparing myself with this other awesome family who is able to do that and enjoy the hosting.  
 
So, what does hosting a party have to do with making the right decision? 
 
Well, I could decide to host a party because I feel like something is wrong with me for not wanting to host a party, so I should host one and finally be normal.
 
I could host a party because I want to be just as awesome as this other family who invited us over.
I could host a party because I think some social time would do us good.
OR I could simply host a party because I really want to.
 
After being honest with myself about whether I want to entertain or not I realized that right now, in the season of life I am in right now I have no dying desire to do so (and that explains why I haven’t hosted one in a while).  
 
It then became clear to me that I was considering throwing a party for reasons that weren’t serving me.  
 
Trying to be as good as others, trying not to miss out on something, trying to be someone who I am not.  
Those are all the reason that would cause me to have a tough time enjoying the party if I decided to have one. (And wouldn’t solve the issue of feeling inadequate) 
 
And so when I make a decision I always ask ‘What is my reason for making this particular choice?’
 
Is it coming from a place of being happy with myself or is it coming out of fear or avoidance.
If I am coming from a place of being at peace with myself, without trying to avoid anything then I know that decision will serve me.  
 
When the reason is coming out of fear – I question making that choice explore other options.
Exploring the reasons always help me make the perfect decision! And even if I miss and make the wrong one, my reason behind it always helps me understand why I did what I did. 
 
So whether you are deciding something small like whether to host a party or to change career paths, I recommend asking yourself to be honest about the reasons for wanting that change. 
If you don’t like your reason it can be a great opportunity to align yourself with the reason that will bring you the results you want.  
 
Happy New Years Everyone! 
 
-Natalia 

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